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At Trattoria, the little-but-cute Italian base along Wabera Street, dates sometimes go wrong, horribly. Dates, those between a boy and a girl, not the fruits and not the calendar days. As they converse and the friend showers the mheshimiwa with a lot of colorful, complementary nothings, you, seated by the balcony, will notice the watchman from the opposite building doze off. Somehow, this scene makes you drift and think about life - the irony, uncertainty and unfairness of it all.

Your thoughts are then disrupted by the clinking of forks and knives on plates, then you realize something, the people at the table across you are doing just that, clinking silverware, neither of them talking. The girl, dressed in a non-creative pair of denims and a blue top, is bored.

She even almost has a pout. The guy tries to initiate conversation, but each attempt is dismally shut down by one word responses. The hunter looks fatigued even before the hunting begins.

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This is a first date. Perhaps in whatever warped way, the problem is the venue. Or the Italian food. Or the BMWs passing by. Perhaps these factors remind these year-old looking young-ins of things beyond them. Dreams that seem so far way.

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Or perhaps the problem is Nairobi. When you visit so many places around Nairobi, you may begin to feel complacent about the idea of dining out. Especially with a stranger, who is bored and pouting.

Maybe, in Nanyuki, they could have taken a walk through the great sewage dumpsite Nanyuki has strange tourist attractions or gone to the end of the rail tracks See? There, they would whisper sweet night tales between the both of them and perhaps even proceed to an 80s-music club where in addition to the music, Fred Omondi a helluva fantastic MC! Then, when the night is over, they would say their goodbyes, the guy would promise to call and the girl would go home blushing, without a pout.

But that type of dating hardly seems to exist these days, let alone in Nairobi. Now, everyone seems to have an agenda. I had this discussion late last year with one of my older friends. You need to learn how to discover each other. You also need to learn to let go.

Half of the people in relationships in this day and age are in it out of convenience. This is ridiculous and foolish. Move on to the next adventure. Discover the world.

The problem with dating in nairobi

Discover yourself. Or to be perched perfectly against a beautiful coastal sunset and to wish you were with someone. You young ones need to learn to be strong, different and willful. Stop going with the crowd. Be you.

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